Saturday, June 14, 2008

Egg, bacon and chips.

Matt and I have just returned from our approximately-monthly weekend treat of going for an unhealthy brunch in Portobello.

I get a bit silly sometimes (I know! Me? Shocking, isn't it?), and I was performing a play with my meal.
The chips were villagers, and they had a bacon pile for food, and there were egg mines where they mined the egg for... something or other.

The village had been enveloped in a mysterious round force field, and none could escape - they would be got by the Gaping Maw.

Villagers were going missing, and many died from the attacks of the mysterious metal alien ships that lunged down at them, or were killed in various ways by 'accidents' in the egg mine.

In the end, only The Professor and The Nurse were left.

Just as they were evilly laughing about how they had managed to set it all up so that the rest of the villagers had believed their evil plan to make it look like there were aliens, and had died, then REAL aliens swooped in and beheaded them.

Num, num, num.

Oh, and I accidentally told Matt that placentas were 'crunchy friends in a liquid broth'...

Anyway, we have had a bit of a bonanza with awful movies recently (Although, of course, we don't know how bad they actually are, they do look terrible). Over the course of three charity shops, we managed to pick up the following (summaries from IMDB):

Altered
Fifteen years ago, five men were abducted by aliens. Only four returned. Now, these same four men have managed to capture one of the creatures who killed their friend and ruined their lives. It's time for payback but payback swings both ways.

Some Things Never Die (Bug Buster in the US)
In the small lakeside town of Mountview, California, the Major decides to pulverize a dangerous substance to protect the local plantation. Thirteen years later, a harmful and lethal species of cockroach appears near the lake, threatening and killing the local dwellers. The famous exterminator General George S. Merlin (Randy Quaid) is called to fight against the bugs.

Snakes (Python 2 in the US)
A giant snake is captured in Russia, packed on a plane. The plane is shot down and the conttainer recovered by Russian troops unaware of its contents. It is taken to an underground base where it is opened and all hell breaks loose.

The Entity
Carla Moran awakens one night to find herself being beaten and raped by an unseen presence. Terrified of what's happening to her, and shunned by friends and family who think she's lost her mind, she seeks help from parapsychologists. The researchers soon discover that evil spiritual force has been drawn to Carla and is responsible for the violent attacks. The question now, however, is how do they stop it? Based on a supposedly true story.

Braindead
Lionel, a Mama's boy, has the unwanted honor of having to look after his overbearingly evil mother. He ends up falling in love with a local woman who believes that they're destined to be together. In a moment of intentional sabotage of one of their dates, his mother is bitten by a mysterious creature that ends up zombifying her. It's only a matter of time before she rises from the dead a powerful, bloodthirsty zombie. It's only a matter of time before she starts infecting residents of the town and Lionel has to stop her...and them.
Hybrid
Set in the future, where planet earth has become a desolate waste ground, a group of military survivors make their way through a desert seeking shelter from an incoming ion storm. The shelter they find is an abandoned research facility, which happens to be inhabited by an evil alien hybrid, hell-bent on their destruction.

Specimen
After his grandmother's death, 24-year-old Mike Hillary sets off in search of who he thinks is his real father. Little does he suspect the real scenario: his late mother was impregnated by aliens, and now they've sent someone down to bring back their "specimen"--dead or alive.

Watchers
Based on a novel by Dean Koontz. A boy takes in a stray dog, later finding out that its an ultra-intelligent runaway from a genetic research lab. Unknow to him, the dog is being stalked by another escaped creature thats not quite so friendly.

So, who's up for a Movie Night?

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5 Comments:

At 3:24 pm, Blogger Tah said...

Interesting meal...

And I can confirm that Snakes (Python 2) is indeed a bad movie.

If I remember correctly, my buddy and I saw several of the movies by that studio over the course of several weeks. And, interestingly enough, the indoor sets were all eerily similar throughout all the movies.

 
At 4:48 am, Blogger Shawna said...

lol I love the play with your meal--sounds like something Dave did once...We were out having lunch, and he was eating gummi bears (he called them gummi bear commandos)--I stole one and put it on my plate, then Dave threw an "asteroid" (a dinner roll) into the "volcano" (my mashed potatoes and gravy) to save the world. I couldn't believe he did that in public...

The movies sound interesting, I'll have to look for some of them.

 
At 12:26 pm, Blogger Mouse said...

Movie night!
Me me me! :-)

 
At 12:29 am, Blogger Nettie said...

I'll have you know that Braindead is absolute quality! Peter Jackson made some great films back then, I think Braindead was his second. His first, Bad Taste is friggin fantastic. It was apparently banned in Queensland when it was first released and has become a huge cult classic over here. I own it on dvd so we can watch it when you come over.

 
At 6:35 am, Anonymous Sharbaby said...

Gotta agree with Nettie
it takes some getting into
but Braindead (Dead Alive in US)
is a great movie and the originator of the phrase
'I kick a$$ for the lord.'

 

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